Why is hating ourselves easier?

I have struggled with my self esteem since the time I found out what self esteem meant.
I would look in the mirror and say wow look at how ugly you are, no wonder no one likes you. I would do something like sports or dance and just think "wow you suck at this and are just making a fool of yourself"
I lived and accepted this for years, I can't remember a time when it didn't reside in my brain.
Why? Why is it so much easier to look in the mirror and pick and knaw at our flaws for hours. Guess what we are flawed beings, you are no less flawed than the person next to you. Society can show you pretty and handsome all they want, but guess what those people are just as insecure about themselves as you are.
One day I just realized ya know what I have things and abilitys no one else has. No one else has my hair or my eye color or my smile. Are these things flawed? According to a magazine or TV yes of course. What the hell isnt to them? We spend all this time trying to look like what society expects or thinks is pretty or is in. Why the hell do we care so much? Have you ever honestly had what society thought was amazing and been truly happy? Or were you just happy because you had it and someone else didn't? Look I will be honest and admit when I have something cool that someone else doesnt I get this little feeling of pride and a sense I'm better. How long does that last? Well until the kid next to you has something better. Then you feel dumb.
All I ask is that we look at ourselves as a person that no one else is. Because we are, we are special, we are unique. Look in the mirror.... No one else is that person.
Now here is the catch, that person has things to offer to the world that no one else can. You have a reason and a purpose. We are here to find it, hello we have known that forever.
Now the tricky part. Finding those things. Finding the things that we have that are unique to us and special to us. You have them, everyone does.
If society says they aren't special or aren't unique then say "screw you society you don't know what you want you are just one big pile of sad self esteem who is full of shit and doesnt know what you want"
Why do you think fashion changes so much? Or how we are supposed to look? Because society can't be happy with it's self.
There is nothing wrong with wanting to look good or get that nice thing, I do it hell everyone does.
Just please don't let it dominate your life... You are amazing. You are you. No one can take that from you.
Find the things that are amazing about you. Dig deep it's there I promise.